you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
