have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
