i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize