Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
