FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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