Hey man sorry I got all grabby
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
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