Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
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