You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
You made out with two different species that night
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
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