The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Randomize
