they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize