playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
