like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
My liver is preforming stress tests.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
