Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
