Kiss
Puke
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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