You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
