Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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