So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize
