Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
