STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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