Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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