Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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