Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
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