too bad you live with your parents still
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize
