That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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