does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
