we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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