I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Im part way to drunk.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
