There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
