she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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