oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
