used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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