We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
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