seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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