She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
