have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
