But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Houston, we have a blender
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
