when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize
