At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Alive.
So much puke
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Randomize
