i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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