i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize