i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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