He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
