dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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