We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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