Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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