There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
