It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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