Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
