Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
