I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
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