whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
